Will life ever slow down? (And do I really want it to?)

I have planned this blog for a few years now.  I even write it in my head as I am driving and the words are the perfect mix of interesting, engaging and funny!  Then I get to the computer and check emails, skim a few articles, glance at a few blogs and wish I was doing all the 'stuff' the blogger is communicating to me, get stuck in Pinterest oogling over a many things, and then computer time is over and it is past time to move on to more domestic chores...  So here goes, another do-over and without the guilt!  I refuse to guilt myself over undone, want-to-do's ever again.
Feeling middle-aged, while not understanding how I got here, I decided to take on a few projects, however slowly, that I had always thought I would like to do.  One of those was playing around with a real camera and good grief is there a lot to learn just to begin to snap a few shots.  Just getting over the fear of pushing any buttons or turning any dials was a major feat for me!  The research and purchasing of the camera was the easy part, the "pulling the trigger" on that amount of money was the hardest part, but I got past that and then let the thing sit in the box until I "had time to sit and study it"... ever do that?  Make a major purchase just to wait weeks to get up the nerve to start using it, waiting on the right time and right amount of time??  I am now happy to report that after an hour with one of my very patient daughters, I am really enjoying this photography stuff, JUST LIKE I HAD ALWAYS WANTED TO DO!  I am proud and satisfied that I made this step, cause I am realizing with each new and wonderful day that I have a limited amount of real living to do.  And right now I am still busy, living.  Slowing down isn't an option yet cause that is too close to stopping!
Happiness is... moving forward, one step (however slowly) at a time!

...not sleeping late on a Saturday!

There was a time in my life when I wanted to sleep late on a Saturday morning.  When I was sure that Saturday morn sleep was a cure for anything negative that happened during the entire past week.  A time when I would, probably did, snuggle down on the floor and fall back asleep as the children watched a little TV.  But honestly I can't think of very many of those times because I never liked the girls watching TV and they were always up happy and ready for a big breakfast!
I'm not sure when I decided I needed a sleep-in Saturday morn.... but on the rare occasion that the opportunity has been grabbed, it has never worked for me.  I wake up at my 'usual' time no matter the day so I really just lay there and doze, and that can be fun but never past 6:30am.  Anything later than that is always a recipe for a chaotic entire day!
Once I realized, and accepted, that I like to get up early and move a bit slower, it has been another moment of true happiness.  I want to be up, drink my coffee and freshen up before the rest of the house is ready to be "needy".  This is my recipe for calmness, me being ready!  I want to have a whole day, not just 1/2 a day cause I slept too late and then moved slow.  I want to enjoy the colors of the sunrise, the calmness of the lake, and actually hear the early morning chatter of the birds.  I want to move a bit slower, pet a little more on my dog... I want the time to be ready for the family.  They deserve to be greeted by the domestic goddess and engineer of their home with a smile that radiates from a happy heart and I deserve the time to move a bit slower to make that happen.
My name is Deby and I LIKE getting up early on a Saturday morning!

March 4, 2013

Ok, what happened?
A year ago I started this blog and then before I knew anything at all a whole year passed. 

Happiness is.... from the perspective of just having my 55th birthday, of being the mom of 3 awesome daughters, one with autism and in jr. high, one being in grad school working on a PhD that I struggle to understand even the title, and one that made me the grandma of twin girls this last year! 
Happiness is....
My birthday was a couple of days ago.  My husband decorated with streamers and balloons, tons of gifts, cake, flowers... He does come through, he is trained well because I do the same for this entire family.  Birthdays are the only day that belongs to the b'day person, right?  And, when you leave home, it is never the same.  No one ever cares as much as the family did, right?  So, I make it a big deal, and my children will make it a big deal for their kids.... just show some love!
And all that was happy, and fun... and especially heartfelt.  But here is where the unusual part comes in, where I actually followed through with a "feel good idea", a "you only live once", a "make this the year you find a little bit of time to do what makes your life so good"  time! 
Everyone went to bed, John had a fire going in the fireplace... I was the last to head to the bed.  It was then that I realized it was the weekend, there was a nice gentle fire going, my couch is solid down feathers....  I grabbed a pillow and snuggled up on the couch and fell asleep watching that fire.  And it didn't take long! but that wasn't the point.  The point was I did something to enjoy my home and myself.  I woke up later in the night, said a thank you prayer as I headed to bed and finished my night in my comfy bed.
My resolution for my new year of life.... enjoy something each day, it's worth it, I'm worth it:)